I was watching a very interesting documentary on the king cobra. This is a very adaptive snake that is fast on land and water and you can also find it on top of trees. The most amazing thing that the snake does is that, for it to grow, it takes in a lot of water and some food, then it retreats to a hiding place where it sheds off the old skin including the covering of the eyes. It comes out of the hiding place refreshed and with new energy. In the documentary, the first thing that the snake does after it refreshed is to hunt for new prey. It won’t take any but the best.
What does this mean in our relationships? After being in any relationship for some time, we all need to grow in one way or the other. First, you need to find out what needs of the relationship were not met in the previous year. Similarly, you would also like to know what is there for the relationship for the coming year.
Starting afresh means that you first have to know what could be causing your relationship, from having further growth.
The most adaptive way in any relationship is always to note when to retreat from the relationship demands and take some time to know how to start afresh. Starting afresh means that you first have to know what could be causing your relationship, like the snake’s skin, from having further growth. Could you be holding on to an event of the past in such a way that you cannot grow in a relationship? Could you be having unrealistic demands or is it a deficiency in you that you concentrate on so much that you don’t see your strengths? After looking into the things that you need to shed off, you have taken the first step towards new beginnings in your relationship.
The next step that you need to make is looking at how you would like to start doing things differently after shedding off what you have already identified as preventing growth within the relationship. In so far as relationships are concerned, instead of concentrating on what the other person in the relationship should change this year, look at what you can do differently to make the relationship better. What will be your new prey now that you’re renewed? Remember this should be nothing but the best. So, if your communication was not good enough because you were not good at initiating then maybe you need to be the best initiator not just a good one.
What do you need to shed off this year and what do you need to be best in?
About Kenneth
Kenneth Kariuki is an experienced Family and Marriage Counsellor. He specializes in family & marriage therapy, youth therapy, and families with children with special needs.
To book an appointment with Kenneth, kindly Call / WhatsApp +254 745 562 108 or book a session below.
